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Non-op Transsexual
Favorite Look:
Hippy Chick
In the words of the late great musician Prince, 'I'm not a woman, I'm not a man, I am something you will never understand'. I am 69, 5' 6" with eyes of blue and an OAP bus pass! I am retired, happily single, solvent and live alone on the Sussex coast. I have everything a girl could wish for. I didn't start to dress or even have the thought cross my mind until I was 59 - late starters don't come much later than that! I could never find the girl of my dreams, so I decided to become her. Short skirts, high heels, fun and flirtatious. I am 24/7 - and have no male clothes at all. I had my boobs done in 2022 and call them 'Pinky & Perky'. My red nails are done professionally and are 24/7, I have my eyebrows dyed and have had laser hair removal all over in 2021. I was prescribed HRT and a testosterone blocker lat in 2025. I have worn earrings in each ear for the last 35 years. Summer time, I am always in a spaghetti string top, short shorts or mini skirt and flip flops to get the most amount of tan. In the winter for everyday wear I pretty much the same as any girl - jeans, sweat shirt and trainers or thick tights, skater skirt and boots! I will be changing my name by deed poll later this year.
This is going to be a philosophical rambling so get a cup of tea or scroll down to the photos! I am a little over a fortnight from my 70th birthday and the realisation of my hopes and dreams are fading into the distance is all too apparent. I had hoped to begin an OAP pin-up modelling (albeit amateur) career but it appears I missed the boat. I had abdominal liposuction 7 months ago to improve my body shape, it has left me lumpy and looking deformed. I don't feel photogenic at all now and some close scrutiny of some recent photos has revealed more lines that an Ordnance Survey map that I had not seen before! People see what they want to see but it is a little more complicated in my case.
What most people do not know and those who know me forget is that I am registered blind. I 'celebrated' the 50th anniversary of the slow decline of my sight this year. An inevitable and understandable question is 'well how much can you see?' it is a question that I can never answer to anyone's (including my own) satisfaction. I can (and have recently) mistaken the front of a double decker bus at 15 feet away for a clear road safe to cross and yet... I can see the sun and that is 93 million miles away! The eye is just a camera, it is the brain that determines what you do or do not see and it makes stuff up to fill in the blanks!
I have never wanted people to know that I am 'severely sight impaired' (the latest PC definition of 'legally blind') as I didn't want to be defined by it or treated differently but who was I kidding? I have not been able to make or get eye contact for 48 years unless I was nose to nose with the person (my sight loss started in one eye and the second followed suit 2 years later). The art of flirtation, catching someone's eye from across a crowded room was lost to me. My efforts to appear 'normal' did me a disservice over the years with people misunderstanding why I did not return eye contact... and yet, I found four wives! To be fair, I met my first wife before my sight loss started, the second because we worked together and the latter two my guide dog selected more for himself than me! I had a guide dog when I worked in London as he kept me safe on the busy streets, he was also an incredible 'babe magnet', he did all the eye contact and flirting that I couldn't!
Funny how all my life I didn't want to stand out or be regarded as different and yet 10 years ago I discovered I was trans and wanted to show the whole world! {A quick aside - there are no such thing as blind people, there are people who are blind. The same goes for Trans people.} All in all I have had a good life albeit nothing like the one I thought, dreamed or planned I would have. It is not over but I am a lot closer to the end than I am to the beginning. I have always had a job and have done some extraordinary things that you would not believe someone visually impaired would even attempt, more than once I have been accused of faking it and I do understand. I only managed to drive a car and ride a motorbike for 4 years before my licence was taken from me at 21 but I am still a petrol-head and I love cars and bikes. In the last 10 years I have indulged myself with a narrowboat, a Porsche Boxter, a red SL350 convertible Mercedes and a beautiful S-type Jaguar and I still have 3 motorbikes - why you may ask... just because I can and because I love them even though I could not drive any of them.
Discovering I was trans robbed me of all but one of my friends, lung cancer took my remaining friend 2 years after I came out but it has given me an inner peace that always eluded me. Inevitably I lost my 4th wife and her family, luckily my own family stayed with me and remain so. I have new friends, mostly trans or part-time TV's. I holiday and socialise with half a dozen close friends and I am very happy in their company. I am not lonely but I am alone and resigned to that being the case for the rest of my life. And of love... how many chances in life can you expect?
I love my friends and see them individually and in groups depending on the occasion, they definitely enrich my life. They take me for who and what I am, they are comfortable enough to tease me and laugh at my many cock-ups like throwing red wine over the table attempting to find my glass or getting it wrong when I try to be independent and find the loo myself only to end up in a broom cupboard. The merry japes are endless and keep on coming! I attract stare (which I can 'feel' but not see) much to the amusement of my friends - 'they are not sure what to look at, you white stick or your cleavage and alternate between the two!' I do have a fabulous pair I must admit, envied by women of all ages and admired by men, equally of all ages! Gemma and Vicki rib me that my knockers are enormous, I say they are the perfect size! A recent photo from Thailand of me in front of a huge waterfall had Vicki comment, 'Behind those massive tits you can just about make out a waterfall'!
My latest profile photo was taken last week in Chartres, France the day before my back (or kidneys - yest to be established) gave out. I don't like my white stick being visible in photos, I hate being identified as a vulnerable adult but that is what I am in reality. I am planning one last photoshoot with a semi-pro photographer (I generally take my own and discard 99% of them as I am not always in the frame on some!), whether they will ever see the light of day remains to be seen - I set high standards for myself; or am I just vain? You choose!
My friend Andie and I took a trip to Amsterdam last year and hired a tandem, we had a great time. I have my own tandem and although he lives 100 miles away we get together once a month or so and explore Sussex. We are signed up for the London to Brighton again next month. My bestie Suzie and I did a week in Tenerife at the end of January just to warm our bones after a cold winter. Gemma and I went to Thailand (I have wanted to go for 40 years) and I had contact with the elephants which for me was magical, we spent nearly a week in a beach hotel on Koh Samui which had been one of Gemma's dreams. Vicki and I set off for a 15 day, 2,200 mile road trip around France in her new Porsche (a retirement present to herself) and that is partly how this diatribe came to be written. Three days into our trip, my back or kidneys put me in A&E in Chartres and a need to return home on day 4.
My back has been a weak spot for 40 years and ruined my dad's funeral in the most hilarious way looking back, my family have always had a bizarre sense of humour and the story is too long to tell here. I feel so guilty for ruining Vicki's holiday, she planned this trip last year and I screwed it up. When I got home from Thailand last month I happened to sneeze unexpectedly while unpacking my case at home and was not quick enough to brace myself. I knew immediately I had upset the delicate balance of my back. I have 5 visits to the Chiropractor before Vicki and I set off on our road trip and although I could feel my back was not right I thought it would settle down, it didn't. Vicki didn't want to continue the holiday alone and I did offer to come back across the ferry alone but she wouldn't have it, a proper friend. I have had a couple of unsuccessful back ops and the NHS have given up other than providing me with a range of class A painkillers.
All this sounds like a whinge and it probably is but I am annoyed with myself and feel so guilty for screwing up our holiday. I am being selfish, I had 3 cousins, one I lost to cancer 20 years ago, the youngest of the remaining 2 starts his second of three doses of Chemotherapy tomorrow and will not see Christmas. He has a wife, kids, grandkids and comfortable life he has worked for and will not see much more of, I have nothing to moan about. While I plan to explore which alternative therapy to assist my back next, John is planning how to exit this world leaving his wife with as few problems to tackle as he can.
UPDATE 17/02/26
My deepest thanks to both of you who sent me a Valentine's car, I am flattered. xxx
UPDATE 19/01/26
This is the start of my 70th year, lots more holidays planned, Tenerife, France, Spain, Portugal, Norfolk Broads and Thailand booked so far. I have signed up for the BHF London to Brighton cycle in June with my friend Andie which will be a month after my 70th birthday. After a potential diabetes scare and a continuing desire to lose weight, I have altered my lifestyle. I have discovered that diets do not work for me at least and only a change in lifestyle will be effective in the long term. I have cut out bread, rice, potatoes, pasta and cereals from my diet and added in butter (not spread), olive or coconut oil (not palm or vegetable oil), more meat, cheese, more eggs, nuts, berries and seeds, I have also cut out sugar and sweeteners. I walk a lot anyway as I can't drive and live over a mile from town and am cutting my drinking down to less than 20 units of alcohol a week (on average anyway!). I think this is basically what they call a 'Kato diet' whatever it is called it is not a hardship! Time will tell if it keeps me healthy and lowers my risk of diabetes.
UPDATE 02/12/25
Oops, left it a long time for an update! Had a good year with holidays to Amsterdam, Nice, Le Mans and Tenerife. I had liposuction on my abdomen in October - bloody painful! I am now back into a size 12 skirt and can get into all the clothes in my wardrobe again. I have a couple of modelling assignments early next year once I am properly healed. I can't believe I will be 70 in 6 months time!
UPDATE 19/02/25
Firstly, thank you all for the many Valentine's cards, you both know who you are! This year is starting with ups and downs but life is like that. I had a dry January which lasted the full 94 days...! I managed to lose 10lbs and well on track to my target weight and the start of my modelling career.
UPDATE 1/12/24
OMG, half a year since my last update! I don't get on here much but will continue to support the site as it has played and important part in my early years as a t-girl. Having a fabulous time at the moment with great friends both at home and going on mini breaks. Life doesn't get much better!
UPDATE 18/06/24
This is long overdue! Lots of holidays planned this year and a couple of days ago I completed the London to Brighton cycle run on the back of my tandem, Andie was my pilot and we didn't get off and push once - not bad considering we have a combined age of 928 in dog years!
UPDATE 13/10/23
Heavens, haven't updated this for 5 months! I don't get on here as often as I used to. New video above, a fun canal boat holiday with 2 other girls from here. Having bought 2 tandems (one is never enough..!) been out around Sussex with my friend Andie as pilot. Coming to the end of my laser hair removal program that goodness, now I can get my tits out in the sun... except that is is autumn now! Going to the Transliving weekend in Eastbourne in 2 weeks and Hayling Island in 5 weeks.
UPDATE 23/05/23
Thank you all for your birthday wishes yesterday, I have decided to start counting backwards from now on so I will be 66 next birthday! So lovely to see the sun out isn't it? At last, has summer arrived or is this a false start? Now I can get Pinky and Perky on show now without taking someone's eye out with a hard nipple!
UPDATE 06/04/23
New tax year, new photos! I am sure were all fed up with the old ones. Most of these are a couple of weeks old ore newer. Going to the event in Brean 17-21 April (used to be the St Aud's event) say hello if you see me - don't expect me to see you!!
UPDATE 14/02/23
Thank you for my valentine's card... anonymous!! Hmmm, I will have to muse on who you are...!
UPDATE 09/02/23
Pinky and Perky have now settled down perfectly, they look and feel fabulous and I have no regrets at all about selling my Porsche to buy them! Now I can properly fill my dresses and get my tits out for the lads and they don't need polishing!
Interests:
Cross-dressing, Shopping, Pvc, Boots, Stockings / Suspenders, Online chat, Lingerie, Dressed nights out, Watching porn, Panties, Email chat, Wigs, Erotic nights in, Leather Skirt/Dress, Other TGirls, Full Makeup, Convincing, High Heels, Daytimes, Evenings, Weekends, Can Accommodate, Can Travel, Trendy/Modern club wear, Swim/Beach wear, Toys, Mature, Experienced, Micro/Mini skirts, Corsets, Pubs, Nightclubs, I am a non-smoker, Relationship (casual), Single/Unattached, Friendship, Photography, Good Food / Wine, Music Festivals / Gigs, Comedy Clubs / Festivals, Holidays / Travel, Sporting Events, Dresses, Skirts, Books & Literature, Can Accommodate (Overnight), I am Bottom
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