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The Guide to Coming Out as Transgendered
Coming out is one of the most daunting aspects of being transgendered. How and when to do it are important things to consider. Being prepared can help reduce much of the anxiety associated with coming out as well.
When to Come Out
One thing to consider is whether or not you should come out at all. If you're in a situation where you are dependent on your family for support and you have reason to believe that they would withdraw that support if you came out, it may be in your best interests to first focus on finding a secure and safe situation. While many families can react negatively when they first learn that someone is transgendered, this strong reaction can fade with time and ultimately be replaced with acceptance. If you do not have to rely on them for financial support, the fear of their reaction will be lessened and both you and your family will have the space and time to deal with your coming out. Trusted friends and people in the transgender community may be able to help you arrange this.
How to Come Out
How to come out depends largely on what you're comfortable with and how you think others might react. If you feel comfortable speaking and believe that those you're coming out to will take it well, then simply stating your situation may be the best way to approach it.
Most transgendered adults prefer to come out with a letter, however. This way they can control exactly what they say, as they have the time to think it over and plan out their words. They won't be interrupted with questions either. If the person they're coming out to doesn't understand something, they'll be able to reread the letter and think about it before approaching their newly out loved one.
Of course, this doesn't mean that coming out via letter always works out perfectly, but it does reduce much of the stress and confusion.
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